NGP named Vita? A list of better fits
Several sources have claimed that the previously announced Next Generation Portable has been officially named Vita. We here at TheParanoidGamer wanted to take the opportunity to suggest a small list of better fits for the device. Hit the break to view our list of favorites and here’s the kicker, only starting with the letter v.
PlayStation Viper: Agile and equally powerful, the PlayStation Viper looks to change the landscape of mobile gaming forever. The device features a venomous line-up of exclusive titles which are all available during launch. This skin-shedding portable is available in black, white, and green. This device is also immune to viruses and is water-proof. The Viper comes preloaded with Snakes on a Plane.
PlayStation Velociraptor: Oh yeah! Do you want a device that revolutionizes the way you see networking? Then look no further then the PlayStation Velociraptor. With two dual-analog sticks the Velociraptor allows you to key in on your online prey and offers a level of precision that hasn’t been available on a mobile device. It also comes with a copy of the original Jurassic Park and Avatar.
PlayStation Virgin: No amount of unfair media attacks can take away this product’s innocence. Too much? Well, this product is for the hardcore fan base. We can’t wait for Fox news to get a hold of this. This device comes preloaded with a copy of Juno.
If you haven’t realized by now this isn’t a real list, though we can’t help but like the Velociraptor angle, who doesn’t? This post is to make people realize that there’s by far worse names out their for Sony’s latest handheld. Just remember it isn’t official until Sony says so. What kind of name do you expect from the NGP? Can you come up with even more ridiculous names starting with the letter v? Let us know in the comment section.
Ndibu
May 29, 2011 @ 10:59 pm
I liked this article up until that last bit there when you excused the name, it does suck and is in fact the worst name for a gaming device. Just my opinion.
Robert Strick
May 29, 2011 @ 11:06 pm
Do you mean Vita? I don’t think I was excusing it, but rather just pointing out there could be worse. But I totally agree, Vita is a terrible name (if that’s the point you were trying to make)
Ndibu
May 30, 2011 @ 3:15 am
It was and it is…also it is pretty much confirmed. I’m waiting for fanboys to start claiming it is refreshing and revolutionary and such…you know they will
Ndibu
May 30, 2011 @ 3:18 am
Also your security questions are too hard, lol. I like your site
Robert Strick
May 30, 2011 @ 1:24 pm
Thanks, we still got a lot of work to do on it. I would prefer to not have anything, but spam is a real big issue, at least this improves our readers math skills 😉
Mark
May 30, 2011 @ 2:39 pm
Shitty name, shitty platform. This thing is gonna flop so hard.