Mystic Force: Season I - Novel Format

[Sentairanger]

Welcome to Mystic Force Season

Note: Finished episodes are listed in green
finish-finished in yellow
And Stopped in red

Episode 1: Drop Dead Gorgeous [Now with good grammer]

Ever since the whole incident where their mother was a ranger everything changed the family drifted apart. Hilda which was most distant had a job in modeling. There had been some good jobs lately until Ami showed up. Ami the new Model. 5'8" Blonde Hair C-Cup what more could you want? She had been losing Money and jobs
Today is the grand opening of Gorgeous Center a convention center for modeling supplys like tanning, nails, hair products, and other stuff. Hilda went to the center and she had a appointment with the 360 Tanning Co. . The 360 had a booth at the center and a little room for tanning but the real deal was at the shop they had 1000 top of the line tanning beds. Hilda walked up to the booth
"Hello, Hilda 4:30 Medium" Said Hilda

"Oops.. I am so sorry to say this but we don't have a Hilda till 6:00" said the lady
"well I called a hour ago to confirm the bed." said Hilda
"Nope we have a Ami for 4:30 sorry" said the lady
Hilda walked to the nails place.
"All Models please report to the Photo Level" said a guy on the intercom
There were at least 10,000 Models mostly female, mostly all blonde. Hilda was next to ami's setup
"well Hello, Hilda," said ami in a bitchy voice
Then the photographer walked in and starting taking pictures.
It was 7:00 and Hilda left. Not with any tan or anything. She was walking around the corner when she saw it... Ami Attacking the photographer from that same day. Killing him with her powers.
"I don't know what to do" said Hilda "I haven't had to henshin in a long while!"
"Magii.Magi.Magiro!" said Hilda
Hilda was standing in a pink background butterflys flew around her landing on her to make her pink jump suit.
"wow, this feels great!" said Hilda "stop Ami!"
"Oh Yeah Who's gonna make me?" said ami in a demonic voice
"Uza.Douza.Zazado" said a voice
"wait, That sounds like wolzard" said Hilda
Just then Ami Had spikes coming out of her back and legs and two horns on her head
"the Names' Hades Beast Lady!
"That’s to bad you have to die soon, Lady" said magipink
"We'll see who's gonna be sorry!" said Hades Beast lady
"time to show you a little skin!" said Hades Beast Lady
A giant rope what seemed to be flesh rapped around MagiPink
"Yucky, What is this?" Said Magipink
"Maguna.Magi.Jinga" said MagiPink
Just then wolzard came out of the sky
"Well Young lady, fighting my creations" scolded Wolzard
MagiPink reached for her Magiphone and...
"rangers please help I'm in danger" said Magipink
"Where at?" said Magiblue
"At the new model mall" said MagiPink
"Magii.Magi.Magiro"
said the rangers
"Red Fire" said MagiRed
"Green Ground" said MagiGreen
"Yellow Thunder" Said MagiYellow
"Blue Splash" said MagiBlue
The monster had sparks flying everywhere!
"What about Wolzard" said MagiPink
"Uza.Douza.Zazado" said Wolzard
5 Wolf heads which where like missles pounded all of the rangers into the wall un-henshining MagiBlue and Magipink
"Sword Inflame!" said Magired
His Magistick Sword became on fire
"Magistick Blowgun" said Magiyellow
His Magistick turned into a Crossbow
"Axe of Earth" said Magigreen
His Axe started glowing
"SUPER MAGISTICK WEAPON ATTACK!" said the three boys
Wolzard quickly withdrew and went back to infershia
"that’s what I call Hardcore modeling" said Hilda

[The End]

 

[Sentairanger]

Any Advice?

 

[Ricardo]

Before you post your stories, I strongly suggest that you proofread and spellcheck them for errors. This story has a lot of grammatical errors in it.

 

[Sentairanger]

Well I am not perfect but I'll get to it

 

[Michael Joe Red Mask]

Before you post your stories, I strongly suggest that you proofread and spellcheck them for errors. This story has a lot of grammatical errors in it.

I agree with SC, but besides that its good. Also, it wouldn't hurt if you added some pics (either drawn or Photoshopped)

 

[Sentairanger]

Hey good idea!

 

[Sentairanger]

I can't seem to get an idea for episode 2 any ideas?

 

[Sentairanger]

Episode 2: Night Of the Disaster

Episode 2: Night of the Disaster [Now with good grammar]

It was a bright Monday morning. All the Children at school and the rangers were going to. They didn't like High School, Bad teachers, Bad Students, Not to mention the horrible food(which has never failed to send at least 1 student home).
It was at second period. Hilda at Gym, Max at Tech, Samantha at Study Hall, Jamie at Science, and Bobby at Track. Then The Speaker Came on at all classes where they were at.
"Hilda, Max, Sam, Jamie and Bobby please report to the office you have a message" Said The Lady
"Uh Oh" said all of them
The five walked down the hallway, They entered the office and picked up the phone.
"Hello?" said Max
"Yes, Hello is this Max ?" said the lady
"Yes it is" Said Max
"well, Um......... We found your mother's body......It seems to have tattoos and wired scars in hard to reach areas" said the lady
"come to the hospital on 6th and Main" said the lady
The office let the kids go they ran the whole way there. Each one of them out of breath saying
"where is Kat's room?"
"Kat...Kat...Ah, Here we are Kat! Room 15567" Said the lady
Max's jaw dropped
"you guys have that many rooms!?!" said Max
"yes and this is the first building only holds rooms 1 - 50 you need to go to the 21st building alllll the way in the back!" she said
"Ok.....Wait isn't 21st building the crime scene building?" said Bobby
"Actually Yes, There are no other rooms in this hospital" said the lady
They went outside
"Look how far it is" said Samantha
"I got an Idea" said Hilda "I call upon the power of the butterfly. Change me into a Hot air Balloon!"
Hilda had been transformed into a hot air balloon
"Please keep all hands and feet in the balloon at all times!" Said Hilda
Hilda got them to the building
"no wonder why they call this the crime scene building because it looks like its in the middle of one" said Jamie
"yes it does" said Samantha
"Oh no! Look its Mudmonsters trying to find mom" said bobby
"Magii.Magi.Magiro" said the kids
they all turned into Magirangers
"This time, Could it be a challenge?" said Red
"Yes It Can" Said a voice
A Stronger monster came out behind the Mudmonsters he was white and had some stranger things
"My Name is Hades Beast Ghost" said the monster
"I'm Gonna send ya’ to the graveyard!" said Samantha
"Power of the butterfly change me into a Sword" said Hilda
Hilda jumps into RED's hands as a sword
"Use me"
"Ok" said RED
"MAAAAAAAAAAAGIIIIIIC SLASH!" said RED
About 16 mudmonsters fell to the ground
"Master Magicians can't even kill me what makes you think you could!" said Ghost
"Master Magicians?" said pink in her head
"Yellow Thunder" said Yellow
All Mudmonsters died
"Now for you" said Yellow
"RED FIRE, PINK STORM, GREEN GROUND, BLUE SPLASH, YELLOW THUNDER" said the rangers
Ghost went flying in the air but then he grew into a bigger monster
"Mahou Dai Henshin" "turn us into Magi Majin" "Magii.magi.magika"
They all truned into magjin
"Magiking Formation 1"
they turned into magiking 1
"FULL CIRCLE SLASH" said the rangers
Ghost fell to the ground
"Checkmate!" said the rangers
[to be continued]

 

[Michael Joe Red Mask]

Your grammar is getting better by the day. I only found a few spelling mistakes this time. Some of the words just need to be capitalized but otherwise, the story is good.

I suggest you type your fanfics on Word and run Spell/Grammar check before submitting it.

 

[Sentairanger]

Well I make them here out of my mind then fix it up, But yeah thats a good idea