I need everyone's help/advice on this one.

[Forever Knight]

I'm going to put this in point form because right now I'm ready to snap.

So I just found out the following...

-My 19 year old younger bro and his gf are pregnant.
-They both live in my parents house and don't pay rent.
-They only have High School diplomas.
-No post secondary education.
-Bro works at Wal-Mart as a mechanic, his gf works at Sportchek
-Both of them are poor.
-My Mom was the first to find out the other day and she is being silent.
-My Dad must have heard because before I left to work last night I heard him crying to himself in his work office.
-I don't know wheather to punch someone.
-I'm going to tell my bro I have his back and whatever help he needs.
-I'm so fucking pissed off bc his life is destroyed right now.
-His girlfriend is useless, and just cashed in on a wealthy family.
-Did I mention I wanna punch someone?.
-Now my Mom is treating ME different as the "good son" in which this was never done before and I'm 26 years old and really dont care but it's just odd to have her acting like that towards me.
-It's kind of nice to have her realize I'm not the big **** up they've always thought I was lol. But I know this will only last a few weeks.
-My bro and the slut are still safe bc we got a massive family and everyone can pitch in and will so it's not as bad as it can be and I know we'll all love the baby when it's here.

Nobody has told my Dad. So I told my Bro went he gets home from work today to sit down and tell him unless they want him to see himself when her stomach blows up.

Words cannot describe the mixed feelings I have of happy/anger right now.


Someone gimme some advice here on what I should do as the eldest son (for the parents), as the oldest brother, and as a future uncle.

 

[Tiger]

So I just found out the following...

-My 19 year old younger bro and his gf are pregnant.

Wow, how did your brother get pregnant? Biology breaking man!

 

[Skinwalker]

No offense but why can't they just get rid of it? There's no shame in abortion (unless it's too late, but if she's not showing yet there should be time) or having it and then giving it up for adoption.

 

[Forever Knight]

Wow, how did your brother get pregnant? Biology breaking man!

He watched the Schwarzenegger movie.

No offense but why can't they just get rid of it? There's no shame in abortion (unless it's too late, but if she's not showing yet there should be time) or having it and then giving it up for adoption.

a) Abortion is something you live with FOREVER. I won't allow that.
If you **** and this **** happens then you live with it. That's how it works with me. Yes, there is massive shame in abortion.
b) Adoption? Why?... Like I stated before we have a massive family and we can all help is raising the kid it's just the fact that they are only 19 years old is what the issue is.

Would you get an abortion or give up ur child for adoption?... If so then **** you and a half.

 

[Blade Dancer]

This same thing happened to my sister and her bf when I was about to graduate from high school. Though in her case, she was my older sister as opposed to me being the older. But she put the baby up for an open adoption, since the father was a deadbeat and moved a couple of thousands of miles away after he got another former girlfriend knocked up and married her.

Long story short, we still get to see my niece, she knows what all happened, to a point, and at 7 years old, she's finally able to understand it a bit. If you want my advice, it's basically just to be there. Sounds corny, but being supportive and lending an ear or a shoulder to whoever needs it works wonders. Don't be afraid to tell your family what you think of the situation, but be tactful about it. I don't know what your brother thinks of his gf, but try not to antagonize him by badmouthing her unless it seems absolutely necessary for whatever reason.

As a future uncle, the important thing is to not care where he or she came from. Honestly, I'm not thrilled with how my oldest niece came about, but I wouldn't trade her for the world. It's fun to be the "cool aunt" who takes her to arcades and amusement parks. You can be the "cool uncle" and take the kid out to do stuff. Not for a few years, obviously, but still.

And as hard as it is, given your feelings about her, your brother's gf might very well be a permanent part of your life from here on out. You should try to get along with her if at all possible, at least so that she won't be trying to keep your niece or nephew from liking you.

Kinda long-winded, sorry. It's a topic that hits really close to home.

 

[Forever Knight]

No doubt she will be a permanent part of my life with my nephew/neice, that is part of it. I have no choice but to accept it. But this isn't about me.

I'm the most laid back person ever, infact the potheads are in awe by my take on life. But this one here just tickles my nipple a bit too hard.

 

[Midori Ken]

As his older brother you need to calm yourself down. He's going to be looking to you for a lot of support, and he'll start to freak if he feels you're unnerved.

Even if you feel like things are getting out of hand, you need to be able to make them feel like everything is going to be alright in order to make it so.

 

[Forever Knight]

As his older brother you need to calm yourself down. He's going to be looking to you for a lot of support, and he'll start to freak if he feels you're unnerved.

Even if you feel like things are getting out of hand, you need to be able to make them feel like everything is going to be alright in order to make it so.

This is the best advice right now. It's what I felt in the bottom of my heart.

I am going to support and help them.

Thank you.

 

[Skinwalker]

He watched the Schwarzenegger movie.



a) Abortion is something you live with FOREVER. I won't allow that.
If you **** and this **** happens then you live with it. That's how it works with me. Yes, there is massive shame in abortion.
b) Adoption? Why?... Like I stated before we have a massive family and we can all help is raising the kid it's just the fact that they are only 19 years old is what the issue is.

Would you get an abortion or give up ur child for adoption?... If so then **** you and a half.

Jeez...
Doesn't have to be something you live with forever. An hour or two out of your life and it's done, you can move on, forget about it, know that you can wait until you're ready. You say the issue is that they're 19 years old- i.e. they're young, maybe they're not ready to take on the responsibility or provide for the child, maybe it means they have to change, postpone or forget about their own ambitions so they can have a child.
There's only shame in it if you attach it to it, if a girl actually wants an abortion you have no right to tell her it's completely wrong and shameful. It's her body not yours. If she does want to keep it, fine, but she should be able to make an informed choice herself.

You say the age is the only issue but you want to have the nephew or niece and have it be part of your family... Not much advice other than the obvious- support her whatever happens, be the best uncle you can and help them out.

 

[DarkBlaze]

Wow, you must really have a heart of steel to not feel any shame in abortions. It's getting rid of another life for crying out loud! But...I'm not gonna turn this into a abortion thread. *leaves thread and bids FK the best of luck with his situation*.