UltraMatt
Life is showtime
I wanna hear em! Any hilarious, or rib-tickling stories you have to tell of what you did, post em here! Here's what I did last night:
Walking back from the train station last night to my mate's house, Dean was playing with Emily's lighter. Now me being the rude guy I am, I just fart whenever I need to. Loud ones, silent but deadly ones. So I said I had one brewing. He asked if he could light it, I said yeah. So I did a massive fart. What happened? His hand caught fire! LMFAO! He was running down the road screaming while we yelled at him to drop and roll. In the end we ended up pouring Vodka and Beer on it. What? We were drinking. And Emily provided a big bottle of Vodka, usually it's Wine. XD Also, we met some dudes who had just come out the pub. Started talking to them, they were well alright when two of em started taking turns in snogging Emily. We were playing some Rugby, and I just stopped and was like "WTF?!" Then her and one of the guys went behind a car, think his name was Jim. I was just like "Fucking lucky bastard, I'd give my left testicle just to sleep with Emily!" What did we do? We got ready to take pictures, Dean got a video and we captured them with her giving him head. Okay, I now find it disturbing but last night I just found it laughable. I then realised it was 1am so I had to go home, the lads just stayed and watched them. Yeah, we are sad perverts. So what? XD
Walking back from the train station last night to my mate's house, Dean was playing with Emily's lighter. Now me being the rude guy I am, I just fart whenever I need to. Loud ones, silent but deadly ones. So I said I had one brewing. He asked if he could light it, I said yeah. So I did a massive fart. What happened? His hand caught fire! LMFAO! He was running down the road screaming while we yelled at him to drop and roll. In the end we ended up pouring Vodka and Beer on it. What? We were drinking. And Emily provided a big bottle of Vodka, usually it's Wine. XD Also, we met some dudes who had just come out the pub. Started talking to them, they were well alright when two of em started taking turns in snogging Emily. We were playing some Rugby, and I just stopped and was like "WTF?!" Then her and one of the guys went behind a car, think his name was Jim. I was just like "Fucking lucky bastard, I'd give my left testicle just to sleep with Emily!" What did we do? We got ready to take pictures, Dean got a video and we captured them with her giving him head. Okay, I now find it disturbing but last night I just found it laughable. I then realised it was 1am so I had to go home, the lads just stayed and watched them. Yeah, we are sad perverts. So what? XD
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