I posted a personality disorder test in the Viewing Globe thread a while back, and one of the questions was, "Do you find yourself unaffected by praise or criticism?" and I think I said no, but the more I think about it, I think I AM.
This past Wednesday (April 29), I had to meet up with my instructor in my creative writing class, and she kept telling me that I was such a good writer, and I have such a good voice and all that other ****, and honestly, I was not flattered by that. Not in the slightest bit. And I think that's because I'm pretty sure she HAD to say that. You PAY for this class. Why would you pay for a class (particularly an artistic-type class) just to have the instructor tell you suck at it? I'd bet my bottom dollar that the same thing she said to me, she said to every other student. And that's not to say that she SHOULDN'T have--I think everyone in the class had strengths and I'm in NO way saying that I'm deserving of extra praise or anything--but it's like, do you REALLY think that or areyou just saying so you don't crush people's dreams?
It also reminded me of last August when I went to my cousin's wedding. A couple of my other cousins and family members, who I hadn't seen in a couple of years (since they all live in Kansas and I live in Nevada), kept telling me I was so handsome and I should be a model and all this other bullshit. And ignoring the fact that I am too short to be a model, I did buy that at all. 'Cause it's like, they're family. They're people I haven't seen in, like, three years and probably won't see for another few years. What the **** were they SUPPOSED to say--you're ugly as ****?
So, yeah, that's how I feel.